10 Ways To Be Your Most Badass Self.
Feeling less than your incredible self?
Well, my darling, I'm here to remind you that you are a badass motherf*cker who deserves to be happy and to get what she/he wants.
Because you are you. There is only one of you on this planet. And DAMN, aren't we lucky to have you around because you're simply incredible.
You see the thing you must realize is that you already are a badass. Without this list!
Yes, I guess this would be a very short to-do list if this info could be so easily accepted. And for some of you, that's all it takes. A simple reminder that you are great is enough to get you up and running.
For the rest of you who need a little extra TLC, I am here to share with you some tips.
Here are 10 ways to turn yourself into your most badass self:
1) Live your Truth.
You have things to say and people around you need to hear it. DO YOU HEAR ME? If you want to make an impact in this world, you've got to honest. And that means in every aspect of your life. So stop the lying, the excuses, the half-truths and be honest. You want something, make it known. You fucked up? Apologize. You really want to chase your dreams but everyone around is saying it'll never happen, you're too old, it's too hard. Well, they can f%&# right off. Live YOUR truth and no one else's.
The point is to live your life as truthfully as possible. If nothing else, it feels good to be honest.
2) Stand up for yourself.
This can be very hard for many of us. Can all my co-dependent people give me a "Hey!"? But the reality is until you learn to stand up for yourself and be your own advocate, people will treat you like a doormat. So if you find yourself in a situation where someone is treating you like a piece of garbage, you need to learn to turn to them with full confidence and tell them to "Fuck off." Trust me, when you say this to someone who deserves it, this phrase flows off your tongue like honey.
By the way, standing up for yourself doesn't require an actual fuck-you to be said. It can come by clearly and honestly calling out behavior that is disrespectful, hurtful, or abusive. And in most cases, honesty is more effective than swearing at someone.
3) Set Goals
Are you unhappy with an area of your life? Then you need to set yourself a goal. It doesn't have to be a 5-year plan (frankly that's a bit much even for me) but you do need to have an idea of where you want to go. Or even what you want. Otherwise, how can you aim for what you want? And then break your goal into manageable action steps. If you need help, I highly recommend the wonderful Marie Forleo and her advice on getting shit done. You can check her out at here. This lady is incredible.
4) Let go of your plan.
But didn't you JUST say set goals? Yes, I did. But life is full of contradictions and nuisance. Sometimes in life, things don't work out in the way that we plan. We lose our job, we break-up with our partner, a loved one passes away and our priorities change. And that's okay. In fact, it's human. So if you're in a stage where some major life change/trauma is happening, maybe ask yourself what you need right now? Is a rigid schedule going to help you? Or is letting yourself get lost exactly what you need? Manage your expectations with some self-compassion and don't be afraid to let go of control for a little while.
5) Listen to your instincts.
OH HONEY. Oh baby. Oh, my love. Remember when you were a kid and your parents told you not to talk to strangers? My parents told me that if you get a weird feeling from someone, trust it. And as basic as this advice is, I've found this advice quite useful. I have knowingly walked into situations where my gut was screaming "RUN!!!" only to ignore my instinct and end up in a toxic situation that could have been avoided. I can tell you that 95% of the time, my stomach was right. Your body can sense the truth.
6) DO IT BEFORE YOU'RE READY.
Any success or accomplishment I've had so far in life is when I've jumped in. I haven't been "ready" or even fully "trained" for 90% of the opportunities I've got myself. But I was strong-willed enough to say "yes" even when my brain was screaming, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" This has been a key game-changer in my life. Even when I was a little kid and terrified of something, I came to a realization that if something scared me badly enough, it was most likely something I needed to do...or it was a clown (I had a strange fear of clowns as a child).
Do it. Whatever it is. It's scary. It's hard. You may fail. But really "failing" only can truly happen if you don't try. So just do it. Worst case, your effort will be something you can tell your grandchildren about. Or your dogs or cats.
7) STAY LOVING
You've been hurt? Life knocked you down? So-and-so did that terrible thing to you. Absolutely! You are allowed to feel pain. You are allowed to be bitter and hurt and feel your feelings. Feel those feels, my love. Processing is healthy. But please, for the love of all that is holy, don't let it poison you. I've met those bitter, bitter people. You probably have too. The kind of person where you don't even want to sit near because similar to the Dementor in Harry Potter, they are sucking up all the happiness in the room. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BECOME THAT PERSON. How? How do you ask? Stay conscious of your thoughts. What makes you happy? What brings you joy? Who are the people who light you up and make you feel like the golden goddess that you are? THOSE ARE THE PEOPLE YOU NEED TO BE AROUND.
8) You are in charge of who you surround yourself with.
This can be tricky for all of us. There are places in life where perhaps you need to deal with difficult people such as work and on the subway, etc. And so you're going to have to manage to deal with other people in those times. But in your personal life, you are queen and master. The throne is yours, so who do you want in your Queendom? This can change as we all change and grow. But not everyone deserves to be there. The choice is yours, my queen.
Let's not pretend that forgiving is easy. If you're anything like me, you imagine situations where you seek out your revenge. Daydreams about anvils, cars, cans of rotting tuna may be turned over and over in your brain.
But eventually holding onto those grudges and past hurts becomes exhausting. It doesn't mean you forget the wrong-doings. It just means that you are free of holding onto it! Free of the burden of carrying that huge lump of hate or malice. Plus, as human beings we all make some pretty large mistakes, I wonder what would happen if we forgave each other?
This takes time. But boy, is it worth it.
10) You are incredible just as you are.
You may not believe this right now but if there is anything from this list you need to stick into your head, it's this. You're great. Sure, you're human with human things that you need to work on (as we ALL have areas where we need to work on) but you're enough. You're special. You are incredible just as you are. Even if you did nothing else with your life, I bet you have tons of people whose life you've made better. Think of all the wonderful things that these people would say about you. Your laugh brings joy to the room, you're thoughtful, and I'm 100% sure, you're a total BABE.
I'll even bet, whether you know it or not, there are people out there who love and adore you even without you knowing it. How incredible are you! WOWZA!
So when you're feeling less than the badass chick or dude that you are, just remind yourself how fucking cool you are.
I hope this helped. If it didn't help, I hope it made you laugh.
As always, thanks for reading.
Want to see more of my work, Check-out my short film "Billable Hours" Here!